The key to being happy is knowing you have the power to choose what to accept, and what to let go….
I know girl….I know – it’s been a minute since I’ve been here. Sorry for the absence, but the little time off was much needed. When they say it takes a good year to get settled in LA, they weren’t lying! My living situation has drastically improved though. I live in a real home lol, with one other person, so that’s a major upgrade. I do however have three cats (which at times is a bit much for me) but I’m learning to adjust. Life is all about adjustments, right? I have a little bit more peace of mind, and for that I’m grateful.
Now let’s get into what this post is really about – 10 things I’ve learned this year. It was hard to pick the most important ones. Before I get into it – just know that 2019 was waaaaaay better than last year. Girl! LOL. I called 2019 the year of blossom, and that’s exactly what happened. I went from a tiny seed, and blossomed into a small flower. (she’s still growing). There were some important lessons I learned throughout this period of growth thought. Shit ain’t easy, but it’s all so worth it.
Also at the end of this post, I’ve linked where you can shop my entire outfit. Y’all know the deal.
So let’s get right into it babe….here we go.
- You cannot change people – they have to adjust – not change – themselves – Can I get a praise dance in the back?! This had to be number one on my list. I am learning and re-learning this every day. My ex definitely taught me this one. (insert the crying laughing emoji). I always knew, that I could never really change anyone. I’m a firm believer that people don’t change – but they can make adjustments, IF they want to. (Remember, at the end of the day people will always do what they WANT to do). The best thing we can do in order to build a happy and healthy relationship, is to adjust. I would say, don’t expect your partner to change. They are who they are. Don’t get me wrong – Yes, there are some people who can completely transform their behavior patterns, and work very hard on themselves to make a drastic change. I will never discredit those people! But in my experience, that’s not the norm. I would rather have expectations that my partner will simply make adjustments. Asking someone to “change” makes them feel attacked, and most times intimidated. But when you communicate in the right way (saying, “I feel…”) you have a better change of seeing results in that person.
- Yes, you can be pregnant AF and still look absolutely stunning in a wedding dress – I’m talking about Cassie yall. First of all…..her and her new man are so. damn. cute. The love HE has for HER is insane. (ladies, your man should always love you more. I might explain that in a whole different post!) When I first saw her in her wedding dress I almost cried. Cassie girl, you give us young girls hope lol. If you guys know anything about her love story, then you know that she was in a “meh” relationship with Diddy. Then she found her new boo. They cute! She looked so stunning in her wedding dress. I am 100% here for it! Maybe I should get pregnant and have a wedding too so I can be on my glow up…..
- Dad sneakers are still here – I’m sorry to all of you who love those chunky dad shoes LOL, but I just can’t learn to love them. Somehow I can’t get away with looking good in them either. My legs are too skinny. I look a mess wearing chunky shoes, but I can rock a fly pair of Dr. Marten’s or Converse…
- The Mercury Retrograde was MAD real – oh honey, I felt this in every part of my soul. As soon as that full moon hit, shit got crazy! Everything was just off, and my mood was nothing to play with! I even had to sage our house last weekend and clear up all that mess in the air LOL.
- Rihanna is still my best friend even though we haven’t hung out yet – Although I was hoping Rih would finally give me a call so we could take our girls trip to bora bora, I can patiently wait. She’s mad busy building an empire, so I get it. She’s honestly one of my favorite women on the planet. I know it may sound a bit superficial since I don’t know her like that, but I admire her for her hard work. That girl is icon status, and I’m so here for it. I do need some new music soon though…..!
- It’s a blessing to have real friendships – There is one person who I can always call on whenever I need to. She’s an amazing listener, and she ALWAYS keeps it real. I need that in a friend! Its so funny too, because most of the time she and I are always on the same wavelength. We seem to go through the same things at the same time. If you watch my Insta stories or catch my posts, then you already know who she is. Thank you best fren for always being there, okurrr!?
- Popeyes STILL got some of yall actin a damn fool – I don’t eat meat, but if I did, I would not be waiting in line at Popeyes! Yall are actin up! Was that new sandwich worth the noise? It still looked basic to me. No edge. The New York Times just wrote an article called “Popeyes Sandwich Strikes A Chord for African-Americans.” You know what, Imma leave this right here. BYE lol….(face palm)
- Press-on nails completely changed my life – If you know, then you know. I frequently post in my IG stories when I change my nail color. I’m not a fan of the nail salons – mostly because I feel rushed, and feel like I never get my money’s worth. So thanks to my old roommate, I discovered KISS press on nails. They are a complete game changer! My nails look cuuuuute. If you try them, make sure you carry that glue in your purse in case you’re out to dinner and one of your nails pops off….but they last pretty long for me (1-2 weeks). You can find them at any small drug stores or amazon – I get mine from CVS. Love them.
- People in California wear winter coats in 65 degree weather – and you know what, I might be one of them lol. I get cold easily, no matter where I am. I do think it’s time I got a cute faux fur coat for those chilly nights though. I desperately need a cute coat for the Fall. Trust me – it does get cold here!
- I made the commitment to invest more time into my fashion and music – last year I was so distracted with other things and other people, that I feel like I lost myself a bit. This year, I began to grow again. The process of blooming was in full effect this year. As I sit back and take a look at my life for the past few months, I can safely say that I am exactly where I need to be. I have a purpose, and it’s up to me to fully live it. Time is the one thing that is constant. It never stops, and it keeps moving whether we are ready for it or not. With the new move to Cali, I’ve made a plan to focus on re-building myself. It’s ok to be selfish. I want to make music and perform again. Music is a HUGE part of my life. Along with that, I want to continue to build my fashion blog and styling business. I’ve gone back and forth with designing, but that will unfold at the right time. I am excited about 2020, and I’ve already claimed it as the year of ABUNDANCE. It’s time for me to take more risks, let go of fear, and live the life God intended me to live. The Universe is always working for me, and for you babe.
I’ll catch you in the next one, xoxo